Submitted by Don Dunham, Nancy Grace Addicts.
"Jeff, I only hope I can approach your ususl level of greatness here." - Don Dunham
1. Jacko couldn't sit still that long without having a little boy on his lap
2. The harsh courtroom lighting would melt Jacko's wax nose
3. Jacko's entourage would take all the other seats in the jury box
4. He couldn't complete the juror questionnaire; it lists check-boxes for "male" & "female," but there isn't a box for "androgynous."
5. Our legal system separates Church & State -- therefore no "Jesus Juice" in the jury room
6. Jacko would insist on international TV trial coverage, but most California judges wouldn't allow cameras in the courtroom
7. Jacko couldn't speak for himself in jury deliberations; he'd have to make a home video expressing how he felt about the case, or get Geragos to speak for him
8. Jacko believes conflicts shouldn't be resolved in court. You just get the 2 gangs together and lead them in a dance
9. Now that Avian Flu is about, Jacko's been wearing 3 surgical masks & hiring people to breathe for him. He'd never come out!
10. The $22 per diem Jacko would receive for jury duty would put him into a higher tax bracket.
11. BJ would show up, but he wouldn't have Diane Dimond to pick on
Two reasons TO have Jacko on a jury:
1. If jurors had to be sequestered, Jacko would purchase a luxury hotel, saving the county considerable expense.
2. We'd get to see more of Latoya's gorgeous breasts.
1 comment:
Ha ha, LOL, etc! I think you and I would get on well, Sunny - we seem to see a lot of things from the same perspective! By the way, I haven't forgotten about the other joke I promised to send you. I have just been too involved with the MOTH this last week or so, to do anything that requires effort. I am doing the necessary things mechanically, without much joy, but this too will pass.
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